I've realized that when I pray for faith, God will often lead me through a circumstance that will stretch it--filling the space between where I currently stand and where He breaks in with an increase of faith as I choose to trust Him.
I highlight the word choose, because in this season, I have been realizing that trust is a choice. I've recently found myself in moments where God is stretching my faith, yet I don't feel a resounding fierceness of faith rising up on the inside. It has proven interesting, as I've felt moments where I've felt suspended in the place of knowing He's moving, yet not necessarily knowing when or how--sort of like falling through the air before your feet hit the ground or stepping out into a foggy meadow without seeing the other side, all you know is that's where you're heading, because your compass is leading there; in this case, because the guidance of the Holy Spirit is leading you to a final destination you know you'll arrive at. It's the in-between time that is growing the eyes of faith.
Sometimes, we don't know how God is going to get us to the place He's leading us to, but deep down we know He is calling us there. And the important thing is that we don't rely on feelings. A few weeks back, I felt the Lord whisper to my heart, reminding me "Faith is not a feeling." He's so right. Trusting God is a choice. It doesn't always come automatically, but takes submitting our flesh, our fears--anything that that hinders--to the Lord and saying, "Yes." It's intentional. It's relying on His ability and not our feelings. I've found myself in this position at times over the course of the past few weeks, that when I don't feel excitement or see movement, needing to choose trust, going back to what He's said, not what I feel. Often when our faith is stretched, it challenges strongholds and belief systems we perhaps didn't know existed, and that stirs up a whole bunch of emotions. In these moments, it's important we remember fear is not from the Father. Fear might try and sneak in as we step into what He's calling us to (it's not like fear doesn't seek to be present when we step out into what God has ordained), but He doesn't lead us with fear our pour it out upon us. It's important for us to discern what is going on in our hearts and trust the faithfulness of the Father. The Word says this about those who belong to Christ:
"For you have not received a spirit of slavery leading to fear again, but you have received a spirit of adoption as sons by which we cry out, "Abba! Father!" (Romans 8:15)
God desires to fill our hearts with faith. We need His help to trust Him. We are that dependent upon Him. Just as in Scripture where we see the prayer from hearts rising up to God, "Increase our faith!" (Luke 17:5), God desires to help us and help us choose Him.
God is so good, and in Him we have every need, fully equipped by His Spirit in every way to walk into and through all He is calling us to. In between the place where we stand and the place where the testimony is lies a land of miracles and God's faithfulness. May our hearts be filled with expectation, resting in His timing, His way, remembering it's not in our own strength the thing will happen, but knowing that the God of the impossible will come through. He doesn't abandon. Doesn't forsake. He knows no other way. He will show us when to step, when to rest. And on the other side, just like when a muscle is exercised, our faith will be stronger, because of Him.